Stalking & Harassment

What is stalking?

Stalking is a pattern of behaviour that follows the ‘FOUR’ rule:

  • Fixated
  • Obsessive
  • Unwanted
  • Repeated

Stalking is not usually a one-off incident. It involves repeated behaviours that are persistent, intrusive and cause fear, alarm, distress, or concern for personal safety.

Stalking became a specific criminal offence in England and Wales in 2012 which included the offence of stalking involving fear of violence or serious alarm/distress.

Stalking behaviours may include:

  • Repeated unwanted texts, emails, phone calls or messages
  • Contacting you through multiple social media accounts
  • Creating fake online profiles to monitor or contact you
  • Following you or repeatedly appearing where you are
  • Loitering near your home, workplace, school or places you regularly visit
  • Sending unwanted gifts or letters
  • Monitoring your movements
  • Using technology such as:
    • Mobile phone trackers
    • Vehicle tracking devices
    • Spyware or keylogging software
    • Smart home devices and other connected technology

What is harassment?

Harassment is repeated behaviour that causes alarm, distress or fear.

Examples may include:

  • Repeated unwanted messages
  • Threatening behaviour
  • Verbal abuse
  • Repeated nuisance contact
  • Targeting someone online

What is the difference between stalking and harassment?

Harassment is repeated unwanted behaviour that causes distress, and is often viewed as behaviour designed to be a nuisance, rather than behaviours that create fear or concerns arounds safety.

Stalking involves a level of fixation or obsession with a particular person. The behaviour is persistent, unwanted and often designed to monitor, control, intimidate or maintain contact with the victim.

Some behaviours can appear similar.

Different types of stalking

Intimate Stalking

Intimate stalking occurs when the person responsible is a:

  • Current partner
  • Former partner
  • Husband, wife or civil partner
  • Ex-spouse
  • Boyfriend or girlfriend
  • Person you have had a romantic or intimate relationship with

This is the most common form of stalking reported in the UK.

Perpetrators may also engage in stalking by proxy, using family, friends, colleagues or acquaintances to gather information about or monitor the victim.

This can happen knowingly or unknowingly, so it is important that trusted family and friends are aware of the situation to prevent them from inadvertently sharing information.

Non-intimate stalking

Non-intimate stalking occurs when there has been no intimate relationship between the victim and perpetrator.

The person responsible may be:

  • A stranger
  • Acquaintance
  • Friend
  • Neighbour
  • Colleague
  • Family member
  • Professional contact

What to do if you’re being stalked

In an emergency, always call 999.

Call 999 if you are:

  • In immediate danger.
  • A crime is taking place.
  • You believe somebody is about to harm you.

If speaking could put you at risk, call 999 and press 55 when prompted.

If you’re experiencing stalking, you should:

  • ✅ Report incidents to police – don’t assume it will stop on it’s own
  • ✅ Tell somebody what is happening
  • ✅ Keep a record of incidents, including keeping screenshots, emails, messages and photographs
  • ✅ Review your online security and privacy settings.

Avoid the urge to respond to contact, and remember this is a real crime. Reporting to the police and accessing support should take place at the earliest opportunity.

Support for Intimate Stalking

Intimate stalking is a form of domestic abuse, and NIDAS can help. Contact us to see how we can support you.

National support available:

  • Suzy Lamplugh Trust – Home of the National Stalking Helpline. Provides information, guidance and support to victims of stalking.
  • Paladin National Stalking Advocacy Service – Specialist support for high-risk victims of stalking and professional advice for agencies working with victims.
  • The Cyber Helpline – Provides support where stalking involves technology, including online abuse, hacking, spyware, compromised accounts and digital monitoring

Support Non-Intimate Stalking

Norfolk & Suffolk Victim Care can support you, if you’re experiencing non-intimate stalking, or any other crime.

National support available:

  • Suzy Lamplugh Trust – Home of the National Stalking Helpline. Provides information, guidance and support to victims of stalking.
  • Paladin National Stalking Advocacy Service – Specialist support for high-risk victims of stalking and professional advice for agencies working with victims.
  • The Cyber Helpline – Provides support where stalking involves technology, including online abuse, hacking, spyware, compromised accounts and digital monitoring

Remember

If someone’s behaviour is fixated, obsessive, unwanted and repeated, and it is causing you fear, alarm or distress, it may be stalking.

You do not have to deal with it alone. Help and specialist support are available.